Sunday, January 29, 2012

o___O

Oh, hello!

It's been awhile, yes? A lot has happened. A lot is happening. A lot is changing. As is life, no? Full of happenings and change and such? 

Last year was amazing. Then I moved back home. And I was greeted with grief and sadness. And more grief and sadness and I was just a broken mess. Life is funny like that, all your dreams could come true one minute and the next you're just a pile of brokeness. Sometimes it's hard to find the will to pick yourself back up and sometimes it's hard not to fixate your day on finding answers. Asking questions no one has answers to. 

I think for the most part I've blocked it out. Pushed it away. But not without feeling guilt. But what else can I do? I would still be a mess if I let it get to me. My husband on the other hand, is in a bit of denial. 

Our princess cat loved him. She loved him to bits. They were napping buddies from the day she arrived here. The very first day. You could tell she fell in love with him. And when he would leave after staying here for a few days she would sleep by the door of the guest room and not move. And my mom says she was like that when I left last year too. I tried to come home to see her for my birthday, but it didn't work out. I was angry at first, but thinking back on it, I think I would be even more heartbroken if I had to leave her again and find out she died a few months later. I just wish I had been able to tell her I was coming back. I was almost home. I was a week too late. I think she's still here sometimes, I'll see a wisp of where she would be when I walk into the dark hallway. Husband will here a meow outside the bathroom door (as always). My puppy will bark at the empty spots where she would always be.

*sad smile*

Other than that, school has been... kicking us down. Trying to get back into the swing of things. It's weird, being back here. 

Haven't been too into the makeup scene lately. Nothing is really catching my eye these days. I miss the days when MAC was new and interesting and exciting! Now it's like everything is a re-promote. Ho hum. I am excited for the Vera collection though! Then again I'm excited for any collection that has to do with crushed pigments :)